Father, forgive me; It has been over 5 months since I last painted.
Life happens, other work happens, baby happens…The last 5 months have been dedicated to renovating our home and preparing our house for the arrival of our baby girl. Art works and paint brushes were packed up and stored away. Sometimes doing jobs and chores that take me further away from painting can be mentally irritating. I spiral into angry thoughts —“what am I doing? — I’m waisting time— if I don’t paint then I’m burning my commitment to my vocation. “ Someone once told me, no matter what you do, always do it with your mind and body as a painter. That way when you do other jobs and chores you never forget who you are and what you want in the long term.
To me, other work provides a break, inspires new conceptual ideas, builds new skills, and ultimately pays the bills. I can’t leave out that part.
Renovating our house involved lots of time and putting materials together with my hands in a organized and planned way. If I remained self identified as a painter, my senses picked up lots of skills completing the construction work. Not to mention, I found inspiration in the materials, new ways of working and new subject matter to paint. It also helped with those dreaded thoughts of self doubt; every time I accomplished and completed a new task it gave me motivation to learn and do more.